Tuesday, October 23, 2012

My Friends, Cancer and Jury Duty

So, as if this week has not been filled with enough awful news, I got summoned for jury duty.  Carefree, summertime me got the original letter in the middle of summer break, and, without a second thought, said "defer".  It seemed like a good decision at the time.  In all the confusion and stress of this week, I almost completely forgot that I was supposed to phone to see if I would be called up yesterday.  It was around 11 p.m. Sunday night when the summons that I am using as a bookmark fell to the floor.  Ugh!  I called, and I did not need to report on Monday.  But, after nearly forgetting to call again last night, this time remembering at 3 a.m., I was called in. 

Jury duty is never fun.  Parking around a courthouse is next to impossible.  In my extremely muddled state, I mindlessly, automatically and 100% mistakenly got on to the Long Island Expressway.  The only thing worse than being on the LIE during rush hour is being on the LIE during rush hour by accident.   From the traffic on the on ramp, I longingly looked down at the completely clear Queens Boulevard where I was supposed to be.  In the jury duty waiting room, Regis and Kathy Lee or Kelly or Michael Strahan or whoever was blaring from a television.  Maybe I'm getting old, but nothing drives me as batty as a blasting media source.  Airports have them, hospital waiting rooms, any place where the public may turn to rioting masses due to the horrible conditions and the breath-taking lack of interest in dealing with issues with any speed or concern.  The public must be subdued, and television seems to be the drug of choice.  We are no longer even allowed the option of a quiet activity like reading.  Remember when people would read?  Not on a screen, but words on paper?  Anyone?

Don't worry, this story has a happy ending; we'll get there eventually.  Just yesterday, I worked all day trying to secure an appointment with my neurologist, whom I need to give medical clearance for my scheduled radical hysterectomy.  He is a busy man whose first available appointment was January 8th of 2013, so an assistant did major juggling to get me in tomorrow.  And then there is the referral issue that I won't even mention.  I was dreading having to reschedule it, given the hassle it was to schedule it the first time.  Jury duty is notoriously difficult to shirk.  And, so, with trepidation in my heart and five minutes on my meter, I got my break.  With unbelievable speed, I was first in the jury duty problem line, and two minutes later, I was excused, no questions asked.  The cancer card is coming in handy already.  I called school, to tell them I would be coming in, and I was told not to; they already had a substitute.  Free!  At 10:30 in the morning!  And so, the song of the day, with lyrics modified by me:

Cervical cancer and whiskers on kittens
Summons for juries and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

I am also singing "Hooray for Hollywood", I imagine because the word "hooray" is in the title.  I am a sick, sick person.  In mind, not in body.  Okay, in mind and in body.  But more so in mind.


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